Well-Being
 

housekeeping.jpgThe Emily Post Institute says you should:


Housekeeper: Makes the beds, cleans up any messes and sometimes turns down sheets. Tip: $2 per day in a moderate hotel, $3 to $5 per day in a deluxe hotel. (Tipping daily rather than when you check out ensures that the tip will go to the specific person who cleaned your room.)


Considering that we rarely stayed in hotels as a kid and we were working class people ourselves, I had no idea I needed to tip hotel staff until I was in my 20s. I learned it from a fellow NOW board member when I shared a room with her. She had told me 10% of each night's stay. I always forget about tipping until I'm ready to leave the room. Thus my tips range widely and are based on whatever cash I have on hand. I've left stacks of quarters before.


My friend's awareness of the issue of tipping isn't based in etiquette, but rather unionization of hotel workers:


The more union hotels there are in a city, the more hotel workers are paid. In cities with few union hotels, workers are paid just $7 an hour. In cities with mostly union hotels, that rate more than doubles, to $19 an hour.


I forget exactly how the generous tipping and unionization go hand in hand, but I try to be as generous of a tipper whenever possible in every situation. While I'm not rich, I know that I am very lucky to be where I am financially. I also know that housekeeping is hard work, so I should say thank you however I can.


Do you tip housekeeping? If so, how much?


[Image: Getty Images / MSNBC]

 

Twitter_Badge_1.pngWhen protests and riots broke out in Tehran two weeks ago, Twitter rapidly eclipsed CNN, the New York Times, and every other major news outlet to become the primary source for real-time, on-the-ground updates on what was happening. The event will doubtless change journalism forever, in more ways than one. But let's put aside the discussion of access, immediacy, and who can rightly be called a "journalist" for now, and focus instead on the psychic effects of this new technology.


For years, I've been anticipating the death of literacy due to our high-tech world; I didn't expect the loss of human empathy too. But according to a new study from the University of Southern California, the rapid-fire stream of information from sites like Twitter and Facebook may be stunting our emotional growth. We're deluged with more information than we can process, the report states, and as researcher Mary Helen Immordino-Yang says, "If things are happening too fast, you may not ever fully experience emotions about other people's psychological states and that would have implications for your morality."


Jason Calacanis, an early Internet pioneer and champion, refers to this as Internet Asperger's Syndrome. On his blog, Calacanis.com, the author describes how he's seen Twitter and other new media transform the ways we interact. Today, he writes, it's all about the numbers: how many followers do you have, how many page-views do you get, what is your monthly subscriber count? But numbers aren't human beings. No longer do we see the eyes of the person sharing heartbreaking news; no longer do we think twice about flaming a fellow forumite on a discussion board. It's all removed, virtual, computerized.


Except it isn't. There are still real people at the ends of each Internet connection, and sometimes the anonymity of online communiques dehumanizes them for those on the other end -- and vice versa. To cite an extreme but very real example: the case of Choi Jin Sil, the South Korean film star who reportedly killed herself last fall because of rumors circulating the web about her.

 

 

Nicholas Kristof -- who does the lord's work -- was on Stephen Colbert this week talking about his Sunday column on endocrine disruptors and their impact on water animals and humans. "We don't know for sure that these chemicals are harmful," Kristof writes in a follow-up. "But the evidence is mounting."


Kristof got interested in the issue after watching Hedrick Smith's Frontline special, "Poisoned Waters." He wonders if today's frog deformities from agricultural chemicals is somehow linked to the explosion of cases of hypospadia in human beings. The key is endocrine-disrupting chemicals, or EDCs. Phthalates, used in plastics, are significant endocrine disruptors and there may be a connection with hypospadias. These are questions have have to be asked with great seriousness. If anyone can find humor in this grim issue, it is Stephen Colbert, who also, in his own fashion, does the lord's work with levity.


 

beyonce-knowles-nose-job.jpgPeople get nose jobs all the time. It's become something of a status symbol: once you've made it, you get to make totally unnecessary and costly changes to your face. Jennifer Aniston got one, as did Katie Holmes, Beyonce, Marilyn Monroe, Halle Berry, and of course, the late Michael Jackson. The list is astonishingly long. What do the celebrities named above have in common? They were all beautiful before their nose jobs. So what gives?


In January, Ezra Roth wrote a piece for this blog about the nose job "epidemic" in Iran, where thousands of women aspire to the Western (i.e. Anglo-Saxon) ideal of beauty. He wrote that Iran leads the world in rhinoplasty, with up to 70,000 operations per year.


Now I don't know about you, but I find Iranian women very beautiful -- and not in the asexual way one might describe an elderly woman as "beautiful." No, I find them sexy and gorgeous. Indeed, desirable. And I find them desirable precisely because they don't look like the women I went to college with in southeastern Minnesota. Likewise, I thought Halle Berry was a lot hotter when she looked less like a white woman.


To wit, on Sunday I called a friend with whom I often have dinner to see if she was free. She said no, because she's recovering from a nose job she got on Friday. She didn't tell anyone she was going to get one, and she asked me to keep it a secret. (I figure as long as I don't name her here, I'm not betraying that trust by writing a post about it.)

 

 

Comparisons between Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett and Ed McMahon are inevitable: they were major celebrities for decades and all died with a few days of each other.


Comparing the above to Billy Mays, the king of infomercials with a booming voice and the boundless energy to hawk everything from OxiClean to energy pills, is more of a stretch. Still, you know people are going to do it. Why? Because he was famous too, in a way. And because, like Michael Jackson, he was 50 years old and died before his time.


But the big difference is how the deaths will be treated. When Mays was found dead Sunday at his home in Tampa, Florida, the cause was not apparent -- and the family is justifiably keeping any details fairly quiet.


How ironic is it that Mays, whose unabashed hucksterism was developed during his years pitching products on the boardwalk of Atlantic City, would be the one treated with the most dignity upon his passing?


Or maybe it's not ironic at all -- it's just a reflection of what Americans care about: scandal, sadness, tragedy and suffering. Either way, let's take a moment to commemorate the well-honed skills of another American legend:


 

michaeljacksonthriller.jpgThe LA Times says it the best:


How does one eulogize a superstar who, even without the various accusations of pedophilia, was something of a freak? Or was, as several talking heads put it, "a troubled individual." In recent years, Jackson has been more infamous than famous, known for his increasingly alarming appearance, the charges of child molestation and his subsequent business-arrangement marriage that led to his single fatherhood.


For me, a child of the 1980s, Michael was one of my first obsessions. It was he would inspired me to beg my mom for a pair of faux leather pants and a small purple faux leather purse with the cover of Thriller ironed on. I played my cassette tape of Thriller to death... literally.


Then of course the '90s came and Michael got off track. There was the odd extended ending to the "Black or White" video. Then there was his philanthropic work, from "We are the World" to pediatric AIDS. Accusations of child molestation, his marriage to Lisa Marie Presley and of course his children (including the baby dangling episode).


News broke on the internet of his death, swamping Twitter and Facebook. Even celebs were Twittering their thoughts. One would expect that celebs would be polite in their choice of words, but even those of us without bodyguards were virtually crying over his death.


I came home and turned on the radio knowing that someone would be playing one of his songs. I turned it up, danced and then I was done. I cherish the music he gave this world, mostly everything Thriller and earlier. As for the man? I'll be polite and just say that I am sending love to his family and friends.

 

csn_Books_Sing_Evite_rev.jpg

At tonight's Kenneth Cole Summer Charity Shopping Night event, which takes place from 6:00pm to 9:00pm EST at Grand Central Station in New York City, Kenneth Cole will be helping to raise money and awareness for the S.A.F.E. (Shelter, Arts, Families and Education) program of Making Books Sing.


In the Q&A below, Debra Sue Lorenzen, the co-founder and executive director of Making Books Sing, discusses the organization's successes over the past 13 years and shares a preview of tonight's event. Founded in 1996, Making Books Sing has as its primary mission to empower children to experience theater as a vehicle for artistic expression and learning. To date, Making Books Sing's theater productions and educational programs have reached more than 70,000 children and adults and have been implemented in more than 55 New York City public schools.


AWEARNESS: For readers who may not be familiar with Making Books Sing, would you be able to describe your core programs and offerings?


Debra Sue Lorenzen: Making Books Sing is an organization dedicated to using the performing arts to engage children in literature. As an entry point to becoming more engaged with literature, we enable children to create full-scale musical productions or site-specific works that are adaptations of books that deal with important social and historical issues. Children can then participate in in-depth professional programming, with trained artists guiding them through the writing and interpretation process.


AWEARNESS: You've had tremendous success working with at-risk children. Can you talk about the motivation and inspiration behind S.A.F.E. (Shelter, Arts, Families and Education)?


Debra Sue Lorenzen: S.A.F.E. serves transient children in the school system, children who are essentially living in poverty. The homeless population is very distinctive in its needs - so we create a highly-tailored program that provides them a daily respite from their daily lives, due to the self-expressive, therapeutic nature of the arts. These are people living in extreme crisis. The shelter system provides them safety from domestic violence and access to social services, such as access to food stamps. Families need creative time together, as well as a new way into the educational process. Their daily lives are highly interrupted. The vast majority of these children could wind up in the foster care system, or even drop out of the educational system entirely.


One shelter director described the reason for this very succinctly, "When people are running for their lives, they don't think to grab their libraries." The children from these backgrounds have limited literary skills. Our role, then, is to re-introduce children to books, and the theater as an avenue to acquire knowledge and allow their imagination to run free. S.A.F.E. is an ongoing series of workshops in the Bronx, giving children access to week-in, week-out exposure to literature and the arts. It's hard for them to integrate this into their daily lives. It's even hard for them to come down for the first workshop -- they need to have the right incentives to come whenever they can.

 

 

800px-People_living_with_HIV_AIDS_world_map.PNG.pngHuman Rights Watch reported last week that roughly one third of the world's countries turn away migrant workers, students, and other travelers with HIV, even when their conditions are under control with the use of drugs. In some cases, the countries admit them but then either deport or hold them without offering proper treatment.


People from poor countries like the Philippines and Sri Lanka face the greatest discrimination, and are often tested for HIV without their knowledge by the wealthier countries they move to, such as Saudi Arabia and Great Britain. They are frequently denied medical attention or deported and not paid back wages from jobs they held while working in their adopted countries.


But it's not just people from third-world countries who face such discrimination. One study tracked HIV-positive Britons who were traveling to the United States, and found that they sometimes stopped taking their medication or tried to send them ahead for fear of being searched at customs, learned to be infected, and denied entry into the US.


The report also indicates that people with HIV are often deported to countries where they will not receive the proper medical care, and are sometimes held in prisons without treatment for their illness.


Travel bans on people with HIV are nothing new, but this report indicates that the problem may be worse than previously thought: if sick people are denied treatment or sent to countries where they will not receive proper attention, the countries that are deporting people with HIV are complicit in their illnesses getting out of hand.


[Image: Map of people living with AIDS, UN AIDS Report, 2008]

 

Here's what happens when you put Eric Schlosser, author of Fast Food Nation, in a room with Ronald McDonald, Grimace (a closeted intellectual, apparently), and the Hamburglar (who's got a chip on his shoulder about Twitter):


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newcat.jpgDespicable, heinous, heart-wrenching, and horrible -- these are the words that come to mind when I painfully read about the 19 or more cats who were kidnapped and brutally killed, mutilated, gutted, and disposed of on the lawns of their owners over the past two months in south Florida. Since Mother's Day, residents in the Miami area communities of Palmetto Bay and Cutler Bay have had their beloved companion animals murdered, apparently by an 18-year-old boy, Tyler Hayes Weinman, whose divorced parents each live in one of the terrorized communities. Following his arrest on June 14, Weinman was deemed "competent" after his psychological evaluation and has been released on bail; he is currently under house arrest, awaiting his next hearing on July 6. Weinman was charged with "19 counts of felony animal cruelty, 19 counts of improperly disposing of an animal body, and four counts of burglary."


Miami-Dade County Commissioner Katy Sorenson said, "I understand that pet owners feel very strongly about their little family members. Animals bring happiness and comfort to our lives. So to see them so violated and mutilated just defies all common sense and it's painful for everyone involved. Thankfully, for this community, the terror has come to an end."


As a lover of all animals, particularly cats whom I utterly adore, I can't help but be filled with both rage and despair over the monstrous cruelty so easily inflicted on these beautiful and innocent living beings. Truly, what is wrong with these people! When asked a similar question during a CNN interview about the Weinman case, former FBI profiler Candice DeLong replied:


This behavior is a very serious indicator of a troubled person... possibly they're a sadistic killer in training and they're acting out a fantasy, working up to and practicing what they want to do humans. Cats actually are the most frequently abused/mutilated animals by potential serial killers. Why? Well, one killer told me, "I hate them... they are just like women! They sneak around, they are quiet and conniving, they act like they don't need you, and they need to be dead!" If I was looking for a suspect, I'd be looking for a male. This is a crime about power; control, rage, and possibly sadism (sexual control). Another possibility is that it was some kind of sick joke or game to someone, but if you think it's funny, that says something is horribly wrong with the person as well. The person who did this is dangerous to society. Whatever the motivation driving the behavior, the ability to stalk and kill 18 pet cats shows a complete lack of empathy, judgment and regard for the consequences of their actions. Whether or not you like cats, even if you detest them, healthy people are still able to understand the pain they would be inflicting on the family to which they belong.