And Tango goes to the Pride Parade
Nettelhorst Elementary School has become the first school to march in Chicago's Pride Parade. Parents of this magnet school located in the middle of Boystown, the heart of Chicago's gay community, decided that it would be a good idea to have the kids and the school show solidarity with the community.
As one might expect, some were not happy with this idea...at all:
Children at Nettlehorst [sic] Elementary will be made to march in a gay pride parade in Chicago during the weekend of June 26-27. Nettlehorst is located at 3252 N. Broadway Street, Chicago, in the East Lakeview neighborhood, also known as "Boys Town."
A typical shop window along a main strip of Boys Town (top left) gives you an idea of the predominant "culture" in this part of Chicago. That culture is based largely on anal intercourse and the pursuit thereof.
While the person I quote above pulled back on his criticism some, he still did not like the idea. From what I can tell, the man does not have a child at that school. It also does not appear to be near as "mandatory" as he puts on his blog, so I doubt that children were "made to march" in the parade. Yes, their parents made the decision, especially for the younger ones, but does that mean they were "made" to march?
This is a question that I ask myself a lot as I raise my daughter. How much of my politics and views am I pushing on my daughter versus letting her make up her own mind?
Then I remember that people of all views take their children to a house of worship before the child can even tie their shoes. Children are taught morals, ethics and other views from their parents. Why is respect for LGBT families any different than learning anything else?
We should also remember that no one is too young to learn respect for the LGBT community, that it is OK to be gay and that sometimes respect for LGBT people translates into respect for gender non-conformers aka tomboys and effeminate boys.
I saw the kids on the news tonight and it was the best part of the parade for me. Yes, I love the over the top pride that happens every year, but there's something endearing about seeing families in the parade. It's not a "they are just like us" feeling, but LGBT families are just like us hetero families. But it's mostly that we are moving closer and closer to a generation of kids who will reject the hate because they were taught to love first.
This post was cross-posted at the Bitch Magazine blog.
[Image: Robin Schachtel for Windy City Times]
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I agree with you that teaching children tolerance is perfectly fine, and even necessary. But I do have misgivings about making kids march for a cause. Young kids in a gay parade become mere vehicles for their parents' politics in such a situation, as their presence will draw a lot of attention and their youth will, indeed, make a point. But the point it makes is not "I'm a 6-year-old who believes in gay rights"; it is "My parents believe in gay rights enough to make me come out and do this."
In that sense, I think it's wrong to have your kids march in any political parade. It's using them for your own agenda, much like anti-abortion protesters drag their kids along to their picket lines and fundamentalist Christians make their kids participate in their charismatic church services.
And thinking it's "cute" to see your kids parading around with a rainbow flag in their hand or a T-shirt that touts equal rights for gays is doubly problematic: not only are you using your child as a prop, you're undermining the cause you claim to support.
I'm all for gay rights -- I even gave a speech on gay rights when I was in high school, making everyone in class assume (incorrectly) that I was gay. But I was old enough at that point to make up my own mind and stand up for something that I, not my parents, believed in.
I don't think having children march in a gay rights parade is any more or less political than having a child march in a 4th of July or Memorial Day parade. Seeing a child waving a rainbow flag and wearing a t-shirt that says "Another kid for marriage equality" is no more or less political than handing a kid an Amerian flag and having them wear a t-shirt that says "United We Stand". But we assume it is easier to understand pride in your country than comfort with all gender expressions and sexual identities.
What do you think about having kids go through confirmation in a church? One of my problems with confirmation was that I was told to memorize things like the Lord's Prayer and the Apostle's Creed, but when I tried to ask questions -- like "Isn't my being a 'Lutheran' just a byproduct of my parents' choice to be Lutheran, and not a genuine reflection of my belief since I never chose this faith?" -- I was told, basically, to shut up.
Eventually I compared my church's pastor to a dictator for forcing me to participate in Lutheran rituals and recite Lutheran prayers, and my parents were told to keep me at home until I was "ready to behave myself" -- i.e. repeat the beliefs they wanted me to hold back to them.
I see the same issue with the gay pride parade, and even a 4th of July parade. Making a kid wear a "United We Stand" t-shirt makes a political statement that goes beyond national pride. It's forcing a jingoistic message onto a child before the child even understands what he/she is saying.
In my view, this is how ideologies become dangerous: people simply adopt what they were told by their parents.
Just because you and I both agree that gay rights is an important issue does not make it OK to force that belief on our children before they're old enough to know what they think. It's exactly the same thing as the abortion activists using their kids as vehicles for their beliefs, only for a different kind of cause.
My point is, we shouldn't use our children as props for any ideological agenda, no matter what the agenda may be.
But this does not mean that parents can't do their best to teach values they hold dear at home. Teach away. Just don't make your kids into cute little marchers for your social and political causes.
Maybe this seems extreme to some, but there has to be some way to teach children about this important human rights movement. I myself have gone through 13 years of a highly regarded public education system and 2 years of college, and this year
was the first I knew about the 1969 Stonewall riots.
-Sarah